Seeing my Mother Through Her Father’s Eyes

Last night’s demonstration at Roen in Glenshaw, PA was amazing in many ways. It was my first demonstration in Pittsburgh and I was honored to have both new and familiar faces in the crowd, some belonging to friends and classmates I haven’t seen in thirty years!

The venue, Roen HQ in Glenshaw, was perfect and I’m looking forward to making this space a home for events in Glenshaw.

There is a moment in every event when the room shifts. Someone’s breath catches. A hand goes to the mouth. Eyes fill with tears, a lip quivers, and tissues are passed to someone experiencing the unforgettable energy of the presence of their loved one. Emotion and recognition move through a person like something unlocking.

Last night a very unusual spirit, one I wasn’t prepared for, came through. We first heard from a grandmother and father who came through together with a message and invitation to the room. They were recognized right away and shared a cheerful hello and words of encouragement. Next a father showed himself with evidence consistent with his life, blaming his sour attitude on sleepless nights with sleep apnea.

Next we heard from a vibrant mother, full of personality. She came in waving a lipstick stained cigarette and taking charge of the room just as she always had in life. She was a woman who carried everything and made sure everyone knew it. She had strong opinions about how things should be done and stronger opinions about everyone else’s inability to do them correctly.

But underneath all of that intensity was something quieter and more tender. She came back with a message of profound pride for her daughter, recognizing in her a gift she herself had always wanted. She wanted to celebrate her daughter for embodying the qualities she had always wished she could express more freely herself.

Her strong energy was enough she was able to share her own words, repeating a phrase often spoken at home. “Whatever you do for the least of these, you do for me.” Her daughter recognized it immediately. It was exactly how her mother talked. It was exactly what she believed. Even without a a strong religious faith she had strong values of service and care for others. And it was exactly what her daughter was living out in the world every day.

It was the last reading, though, that took my breath away and shifted the energy of the room noticeably. I connected with a father in spirit who showed me he passed in the hospital after a long illness. He was cared for at home for many years but passed in a hospital, fully awake yet moving in and out of consciousness like a swimmer going above and below the water. His final gesture, the one he wanted to share, was his daughter sitting on his left side holding his hand. He turned his head to see her and without speaking said his goodbye.

It was an unforgettable, emotional, pivotal moment.

When I scanned the crowd to see who could recognize this gentleman, my mother, who was attending the event, spoke up. “That sounds like my Dad,” she said. She remembered that moment vividly.

As always, our intentions are so powerful. Before the event I set my intention clearly for spirit to show me evidence I could not have known any other way. As some of the people attending were friends, there was a chance I knew their loved ones and I didn’t want that to distract me. It never occurred to me that my own grandfather would share a message for his daughter. And even more striking, that I would see my mother through his eyes, love my mother through his heart, and know the tender gratitude and pride he had for my mother.